Domestic Abuse – A Parent’s Concerns For her Daughter

The Daily Mail’s Femail magazine today (29th October 2015) shares the story of a mother who has had to stand by and watch as her child suffers at the hand of a violent and abusive spouse.

The story will touch many who know or suspect that their now-adult children, siblings, work colleagues and friends are trapped in abusive relationships.

Domestic abuse continues to be a scourge on many families.

In our work as specialist family lawyers in Lincoln we see situations where abuse is carried out by men against women and also, let us not forget, by women against men. There is no reason to believe that the incidents of abuse should be any less within same-sex relationships either.

Domestic violence or domestic abuse?

There has been a move in recent years to broaden the public’s awareness of abuse issues. Part of that has been to change the language used when describing such matters.

The phrase “Domestic violence” risks limiting people’s concerns to clear incidents where violence has occurred. The phrase domestic abuse recognises that a great deal of harm is done within relationships where no physical violence actually occurs.

What is domestic abuse?

The government defines domestic abuse as

“…any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive, threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between those aged 16 or over who are, or have been, intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality. The abuse can encompass, but is not limited to:

  • psychological
  • physical
  • sexual
  • financial
  • emotional

Controlling behaviour

Controlling behaviour is a range of acts designed to make a person subordinate and/or dependent by isolating them from sources of support, exploiting their resources and capacities for personal gain, depriving them of the means needed for independence, resistance and escape and regulating their everyday behaviour.

Coercive behaviour

Coercive behaviour is an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim.


There are various agencies you can contact if you or someone you know is involved in an abusive relationship. A government curated list can be found here with agencies helping both men and women, whether heterosexual or in same sex relationships.

Taking legal advice about domestic violence and domestic abuse

In some cases you will need to take legal advice in order to remove an abusive partner from the family home or to prevent harassment from taking place.

You can contact us here at Diane Genders, specialist family solicitors based off Tritton Road in Lincoln by calling us on 01522 515600 or emailing us through our contact page by CLICKING HERE.